As the month end (i)

As the month end (i)
I am sitting outside home looking
them all parents heading to town
as if they can’t see or feel the cold that I feel.
This cars heading up and down forming a painful blind
... feeling in me. They keep passing hereby my home not knowing
that deep in me solidity of memory is stabilizing.
looking at the house see so quite as if she will step out
with her black bag, sided weave, beautified smile,
can hear her voice inside the house saying what should I get for you
can smell her perfume through the breeze in this morning snowed
with depression of my ears, hears and tears.
as the bus stop and leave I visualize her smile through the window
love transferred via Bluetooth.
as the day go my heart lean to see the bus come
soon I see the bus red as if love shall be remade in me.
my eyes wide opened longing for foreseeing but again the thought
rose again...........she is not there.
I see the tears on their eyes as their wishes disappear with the bus
as if it carried all our happiness.
I stand strong behind knowing all the deeds opening my arms
to curl them saying hope for the mark shall never be changed nor removed.
Everything shall be alright, I aint gonna quit until you are well comforted my brothers